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 My attention span is getting shorter than my length of time between pees, so I’m going to distract you with the fantastic-ness that people send me. First, the cute. Patty Punker gave me this. I was going to originally wait and snap a pic with Paul in it, but based on those latest photos of THE OVERLORD, [...] Here we go again, Interwebz! Since I missed sharing all the gory June details with you due to that whole move and national holiday thing, today you get DOUBLE the frightening search results that led people to my douchey little blog. Well not double exactly. Or even kind of. It’s really the same amount I give you [...] Apparently a Super Bowl party isn’t supposed to involve a White Elephant gift exchange or caroling, or scavenger hunts, or craft projects, or costumes, or any of the activities I had planned. It seems people prefer to sit and *gasp* watch the game. *yawn* I don’t get it. All I saw on the TV screen was a whole [...] My mom called me yesterday after reading yesterday’s post. It seems she is mildly uncomfortable about reading what things make me moist. To be fair, I’d really rather not know what makes her moist, either. And yet…I do. So now we’re even. Cue phone ringing in 5…4…3…2… Love you, Mom. This post is only going downhill form here, Interwebz. [...] I love kazoos. Next to the ukulele, they’re the single easiest instrument to play. There was even a brief moment there where I considered becoming a professional kazoo artist after being wowed by this gal’s skill. Imagine my joy when I learned I could make customized BugginWord kazoos. Imagine Rocco’s horror when two ginormous boxes of those [...] I had dinner with two of my three brothers last night. I thought for sure I’d have a fantastic blog this morning because those fuckers are hysterical, right? RIGHT? Denied. It’s like they’re TRYING to thwart my aspirations to have one single coherent and mildly amusing post this week. Fuckers. I don’t think they said two words the whole [...] Me: Hi Pookie. Don: You answered! I thought you’d be busy with your genital origami. Me: My genitals are at Wicked. Don: You’re at Wicked right now? Me: No Rocco is. I know it’s not really your area of expertise, but there aren’t a whole lot of installations you can create with labia. Don: Oh. So what are you doing [...] You know how sometimes someone makes some obscure off the cuff reference to something you’ve never heard of before that makes your head really hurt when you try and comprehend what they’ve said and then you’re all, “You made that up,” and they’re all, “Nu-uh it’s for realz,” and so you get on the internet and [...] *whimper* My ass is officially kicked. Next time I consider taking a gig to cover a six city tour in three weeks, can you please punch me in the kayak? Hard? With brass knuckles? If you aren’t allowed to take decongestants, you probably shouldn’t fly cross country with a sinus infection. I blew out my ear on the [...] |
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