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Me: I need a word. Thom: Bird. Me: No. Thom: The bird is the word. Me: No, it’s like “frequent” but it’s not that. Thom: Elly, I don’t know if you’ve heard but the bird is the word. Me: Bird is not the word. It has more syllables. And it’s a verb. Thom: The bird, bird, bird – the bird is the word. Me: [...] Maryland is a strange place, Interwebz. After our long, uke-filled car ride, we were eager to get settled into our room at the world famous Hampton Inn of Fruitland. A ridiculously chipper blond manned the desk. I plopped Herbert, sheathed in his powder blue bag, atop the counter and began rummaging through my bag. “Checking in,” I [...] I’m back, bitches. I’ll give you the highlights of Ocean City next week, but I would be remiss if I didn’t at least try and convey what it’s like to spend hours in the car with my husband and little brother. This basically sums up all the conversations we had…you know, in between Thom plunking away [...] The Lonon clan has descended on Maryland in anticipation of this weekend’s Great Gwatification, so I tricked my little brother into joining in on my ukulele fun. Turns out he learned four whole chords over the course of our four and half hour drive. For those of you not good with math, that’s almost a chord [...] I had dinner with two of my three brothers last night. I thought for sure I’d have a fantastic blog this morning because those fuckers are hysterical, right? RIGHT? Denied. It’s like they’re TRYING to thwart my aspirations to have one single coherent and mildly amusing post this week. Fuckers. I don’t think they said two words the whole [...] Seeing as how it’s Pride Month and I’m in Chicago recovering from a 7am event (after a dinner event last night and a 7am breakfast event in Detroit yesterday) I’m just going to share a little snippet of a conversation with my little brother, Thom. We were out to dinner with Matt and Gwen in the [...] Three days and two showers later, I’m still picking glitter out of my pubes. I know I prattled on yesterday about how nifty the island was, but I have to tell you about the magic that was specifically Figment, too. FIGMENT’s vision for art looks past the white-walled galleries and into the realm of participation. Art [...] There are days when I can’t imagine ever leaving this area. Then I read the Travel section of the New York Times and I can’t imagine ever staying in this area. But then I spend a random Saturday wandering around an abandoned military installation overrun for the day with artsy hippies, and I know I’ll never [...] I’m a little melancholy today. Don’t panic, I promise this isn’t all doom and gloom. There’s plenty of obscenities, ass smacking, unicorns, bunnies, and gangsta rap if you just stick with me to the end. It’s just been a funny week so I’m having trouble focusing. One of my favorite people on earth had a little setback [...] In the month of April, exactly sixty-four people landed on BugginWord after searching for “rod stewart latex.” Sixty-motherfucking-four people. Which proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that my readers are incredibly confused and disturbed individuals….with decidedly dicey musical tastes. Speaking of mean and horrible, I received this text from Thom yesterday: “Just in case you were [...] |
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