My apartment has a photo shoot today. She’s going back on the market so the realtor needs some glamor shots to include in the mail-order apartment catalog or something. (Yes my apartment is a girl. If I’m going to crawl up inside something and live there, I’d rather it be a girl than a dude. But [...]
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I’m quitting. Again. My wee Hoboken apartment has been on the market for four frickin months – four long, long, vacuuming filled months. We’ve received a whopping ZERO offers over those four fabu months. So as of this morning, my apartment is off the market. Uncle. The end. Stick a fork in me. I’m singing and everything. With [...] Have you ever read something really wonderful that totally resonates with you and it worms its way into your head and you think about it all the time but then when you try to explain it to other people they look at you blankly, then with horror, then slowly back away from you while you keep [...] I’ve never sued anyone before. Let’s take the positive approach here. You’re supposed to try one new thing every day, right? Well today’s new activity will be suing a bank. Hoo-frickin-ray. You guessed it – all is going rather poorly in my quest to move to Maplewood. Move…aw HELL…all is going poorly in my quest to make [...] Question: What do you call 10,000 lawyers on the bottom of the sea? Answer: A good start. We’re finally off to the aforementioned good start. I just mailed a big ‘ol mamajamma of a check to retain my new lawyer, Bob. So far, I’m pretty sure he’s nifty. He was recommended by my original lawyer and I’d hire [...] Two months later, we’ve finally heard back from our title company. The news ain’t good. I guess it isn’t horrible, either. First, let me back track and catch you up. Many years ago in a magical land called Washington Heights, our hero (I won’t use the feminine version in case Thom reads this – you know his [...] I finally purchased a new pair of sneaks yesterday on my shopping excursion with Rocco. We decided an outing was just what we needed to keep our minds distracted while we wait…and wait…and wait…to see where all these fun house negotiations take us. When we were getting ready to put the Hoboken place on the market back [...] As all the pending items standing between us and the sale of our condo are slowly resolving, Rocco is increasingly freaking the fuck out. Poor bastard. I’m the first to admit I place very high expectations on my loved ones. I’m always cajoling them into doing things they don’t want to - sometimes because I think it’s [...] |
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