Relief

As you probably noticed, I’ve been a little off my game for the past week or so.  There have been no references to glitter.  I’ve broken three drinking glasses.  My house is dirtier than Lindsay Lohan’s crotch.  My fridge is emptier than Sarah Palin’s mind.  Hell, I don’t think I’ve […]

A Visit to the MoMA

I feel like it should be raining.  The sunny day somehow seems incongruous with my mood.  Maybe I just need some high fructose corn syrup or something. Yesterday, I went to see the exhibit “Picasso: Themes and Variations.”  You know I love me some Picasso.  (Just not quite the same […]

Lunch is the Most Important Meal of the Day

Day 5.  No cell phone.  I’m about this far *making same hand gesture I use to describe Tom Cruise’s penis* from painting a keypad with my own blood onto a volleyball and calling it Webster.  Fortunately, I don’t think I can fit a volleyball in my back pocket.  If the […]

Picking Favorites

Welcome to the end of 2009, bitches. I can’t decide how I’d rate the year.  It was five million times better than 2008, and not just because the lack of toxic chemicals being pumped into my system allowed me to remember and experience the year.  That certainly helped, though.  Then […]

Career Possibilities

So now that we’ve established I’m going to live forever and not end up married to the ruler of a small third world country, I guess I have to start thinking about what I want to be when I grow up. I’m not exactly itching to return to the daily […]

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