I’m finding the whole space/time continuum thing really tricky today. Entire hours are disappearing right before my eyes and somehow I’m not accomplishing anything! *pauses to alphabetize “They Might Be Giants” CD’s on desk – tries to break world record for amount of time faux tap-dancing while seated – answers call from realtor trying to schedule [...]
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I think I mentioned that I bought a house last week. *pulls out paper bag and breathes deeply several times* I also put my wee Hoboken pad on the market. The thing is, she (much like my little brother) is not getting much action. Obviously I’m not doing a very good job of keeping my pimp hand [...] After nine long and expensive months, I am pleased to say we now have a clean title on our apartment. Also, as an added bonus, THEY (ya know, the MAN and his goons) can no longer seize my apartment if the guy across the hall defaults on his mortgage. Who would have ever thought it would [...] I’ve never sued anyone before. Let’s take the positive approach here. You’re supposed to try one new thing every day, right? Well today’s new activity will be suing a bank. Hoo-frickin-ray. You guessed it – all is going rather poorly in my quest to move to Maplewood. Move…aw HELL…all is going poorly in my quest to make [...] Question: What do you call 10,000 lawyers on the bottom of the sea? Answer: A good start. We’re finally off to the aforementioned good start. I just mailed a big ‘ol mamajamma of a check to retain my new lawyer, Bob. So far, I’m pretty sure he’s nifty. He was recommended by my original lawyer and I’d hire [...] Two months later, we’ve finally heard back from our title company. The news ain’t good. I guess it isn’t horrible, either. First, let me back track and catch you up. Many years ago in a magical land called Washington Heights, our hero (I won’t use the feminine version in case Thom reads this – you know his [...] I slept a little later than I’d like to admit after a long night of charitable giving, so I hadn’t yet called the Hoboken Municipal Court before my phones started jingling. After the third panicked, “I can’t wait any longer – do you need bail money?” I figured I better make the call before my loved [...] More Boxes Yesterday all the shit we’d had in storage for the past six months was re-delivered to the apartment. I really don’t know if it gets much more depressing than that. I mean, it was one special kind of hell to re-assemble our furniture and unpack all the boxes that never even left the apartment. [...] Day two of the Great Closet Renovation of ’09 (or as I like to call it – the condolence prize for not successfully moving) did not go as smoothly as day one. Let’s just say some idiot (well maybe not an idiot per se but more of a chemically retarded individual) is not as skilled with [...] |
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