First the good news: not only am I still cancer free, two and half years later (WOOT!) I also had a magnificent dream last night where by future BFF Neil Patrick Harris and his partner lived in a bus next to my window and we played ukuleles together all night long in a desert while sipping [...]
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I keep trying not to write about this. Because I know it’s not the sort of thing you’re supposed to say out loud. But people, I say everything out loud. And trying not to write about it makes it the only thing I think about which makes it impossible for me to write about anything else [...] So seeing as how I’m hoping to someday trick someone into publishing that book of mine, I’ve been reading a lot of memoirs, cancer ones in particular. That’s how I ended up reading The Middle Place. And that’s when I decided all hope was lost for me and Lymphomania because HOLY FUCK THAT LADY CAN WRITE. He [...] I think I’ve figured out why I’m not sleeping. And surprisingly, it’s not just because I looked at this photo just before going to bed last night: Replace the Gulls with Swans and Let the Nightmares Begin Though I’m quite certain that didn’t help. (I’m looking at you, Creamed Corn.) You see, Interwebz, I finished my book. Or [...] Once upon a time (or a few months ago), a brilliant and beautiful blogger posted about how her wee two year old son randomly turned to her and said, “Mommy, you are a possibility.” Is anyone else crying yet? Am I still suffering from sleep deprivation and PMS? Can you tell me how to get, how to [...] Normally, I like to push your buttons and see just how much you can take, Interwerbz. But today…today it’s about giving. (Holy Mother of Moon Pies that sounds like a line taken straight out of a Lifetime made-for-TV-movie or a really bad seventies porno. I guess it doesn’t matter since I inevitably end up gagging at [...] I look like I had some serious redneck lovin’, Interwebz. My face is all swollen and I occasionally have to spit blood. Seems my dentist found a fourth cavity when he dug out the first three. Chemo is hell on the teeth, I tell ya. I’m sure my affection for cheesecake is completely unrelated. Also, I stopped [...] I dropped my paperwork into the clear acrylic bin beside the door to the lab. I moved to take a seat, but when I saw a shaking bald man approaching, I perched on the window ledge hoping he’d take the last available chair. The otherwise smooth skin of his head was divided by a long puckered [...] Hells to the yeah, Interwebz! Just in case you didn’t hear already, my scans were cleaner than Lindsay Lohan’s crotch. Which…makes it sound like they were filthy so that might not seem like the best analogy. But let’s face it, I’m really not THAT clean myself. Still, I’m pretty confident Lindsay’s crotch is cancer-free. So I’m [...]
Today is the day The sun in the sky Hold on, hold on Cause there is no design for life |
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