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I think I have a new boyfriend. His name is Aloe Blacc. Aloe like the plant. Blacc like the…um…blacc. I can’t get this song out of my head. (Hey, hey.) Also? I need backup singers to follow me around and punctuate my pauses with harmonized exclamations. (Hey, hey.) Also I’m going to try to say things like [...] I'm a corn holer. No wait…holder. There's definitely a unicorn involved. http://twitpic.com/3ssqf2 # God that title sounds way grosser than it ought to, am I right? Like a bad Limp Bizkit album or something? (As if there’s any other kind of Limp Bizkit album.) Speaking of things that are in bad taste, it’s time for another video. Seeing as how it’s National Kazoo Day, I recruited (as The Beatles would [...] I think I’ve figured out why I’m not sleeping. And surprisingly, it’s not just because I looked at this photo just before going to bed last night: Replace the Gulls with Swans and Let the Nightmares Begin Though I’m quite certain that didn’t help. (I’m looking at you, Creamed Corn.) You see, Interwebz, I finished my book. Or [...] I woke up this morning violently angry at my mother-in-law. Why? Well, because in my dream last night we were shopping at a colossal Costco (think Idiocracy) and she went to pick up an empty Christmas tin from a massive, shoulder-high cardboard box full of empty Christmas tins. I told her I had three unused tins [...] It’s snowing again. *cracks knuckles* It’s making me twitchy. But the upside to ass tons of snow every three days, is catching up on some of my reading. And not just Penthouse Letters. I finally finished Carrie Pilby, written by another Hobokenite, Caren Lissner. It’s damn witty. You know I’m a sucker for witty, Interwebz. …having a car [...] I watched football yesterday. I was told I was rooting for the Packers, but then I saw that the other team was from Chicago. My mom is from Chicago. So of course I had to root for the Cubs. Apparently they lost. I, however, finished a very sexy Lord of the Ring puzzle featuring Gollum. So [...] I still don't understand what a dancing robot has to do with football. # First? Here’s a piece of propaganda. I’m not sure if it’s pro-kid or pro-uke. Maybe it’s both. I just know it’s (as Sister Merry Hellish would say) adoraballs. Seriously. I mean SERIOUSLY. It’s enough to make a girl pick up a bottle of prenatal vitamins and poke holes in condoms. As in Herbert’s condom. You [...] Continuing with this week’s theme of “Bad Decisions from Elly,” let me tell you about the food choices I’ve made in the past 36 hours: Tuesday dinner – buffalo wings and a pitcher of beer (As in, I’m pretty sure I drank an entire pitcher of beer myself) |
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